The In-Between: Book Review

 

Published 13 June 2023

Hadley Vlahos is a hospice nurse.  She goes by Nurse Hadley on social media--in part because she is divorced from Chris Vlahos and now married to Brett Fairley. And I know this because Hadley includes a lot of personal information on her TikTok, Instagram and YouTube accounts. 

Her book does contain a lot of good information about hospice in the form of describing her interaction with a handful of terminal patients and their family members. The best thing about her book is her willingness to share her own journey supporting these people. She also describes them richly as complex and sympathetic people. 

However, the biggest weakness is also her book shifting into memoir at points. I have read and reviewed about fifty books about death, dying, and bereavement. Each one does have a contribution to make to the topic; however, if you are a "just the facts, ma'am" type of reader, Hadley's book will be a bad fit. I do think, however, she makes the topic particularly accessible to younger generations.  

End-of-life concerns is not just an issue for older adults. Death effects everyone. 

Related: 

Books on the Dying Process

Recovery from Rotator Surgery

 

Image from Creative Commons /
Wikimedia 

I am not lifting heavy items anymore because of my injured rotator cuff (right shoulder). 

I have done rehab and recovered about 85% of of the function of that shoulder. I don't need to be carrying huge boxes of books for the library anymore. I can break down loads to smaller bags.  I really do not have the time to do a year-long recovery when I have achieved a lot of function through rehab. 

People keep encouraging me to have surgery, but I am resisting for three reasons:

Walking Lowers Risk of All-Cause Mortality

 

It's a mile walk each way to the new
LDS temple in Ephraim

Since experiencing problems with my rotator cuff (right shoulder), I have dialed back on exercises that focus a lot on the shoulder. I am cleared to do so, but I am being cautious. For the time being, I have stopped doing strength training (aka weightlifting), yoga, and swimming. Instead, I have started walking, which does not make that many demands on my shoulders. 

In 2013, I posted about walking rate as a biomarker of longevity. I decided that it's a topic worth revisiting with a slightly different focus. 

Note: This post is not offering medical advise; it is only to raise awareness. If you are planning to start a fitness regime, please discuss your plans with a licensed medical professional. 

To help motivate me, I downloaded an app that uses the fitness tracker on my cell phone, one that includes medals as a reward for completing a walking goal. I am striving to walk somewhere between 5,000 steps and 10,000 steps a day.  If I walk to the public library where I work part time, that helps me to achieve my daily goal. 

Falls Can Lead to Death

 

Image by Alexander Delaunoy
via Creative Commons

In the fourteen years that I have been maintaining this blog, I have written about falls just a handful of times.  In 2026, the issue is more salient for me because three of my six children's grandparents have been falling with serious consequences. 

• My mother (in her late 80s) is falling about once a month that my sisters and I know of. In February, she fell and broke her arm in three places near the wrist. A decade earlier, she fell and damaged her knee. 
• My step-mother (in her mid 80s) has muscle wasting and dementia. She has falling repeatedly, causing a broken hip and several broken teeth. 
• My step-father (aged 91) fell and hit his head in January, causing a brain bleed that led to his death eight days later. He was living with Normal Pressure Hydrocephalus (which includes gait problems and cognition problems). Additionally, he had the flu that made him even more unsteady.  

These falls, however, are not just limited to my own aging relatives.  This is a problem that many older adults experience. According to 2024 data provided by the CDC and reported by the National Safety Council  aka NSC (an NGO), "43,020 individuals aged 65 and older died as a result of preventable falls."  To put this number in context, this represents an upward trend for deaths: 

"Over the past 10 years, the number of fall-related deaths among older adults [in the US] has increased by 51% while emergency department visits have risen by 38%. In contrast, the number of fall deaths among individuals younger than 65 has increased by only 8%, and emergency department visits for this age group have decreased by 26%." 

To see a graph depicting this trend, visit this link (which is the same NSC link above).  

Why the upward trend?